Fibbing Friday (11/29/19)

(Another edition of Fibbing Friday, this one posted by pcguyiv, this one with the theme of Thanksgiving.  I did my best to answer the questions untruthfully.  Time will tell if I was successful.)

https://pcguyiv.wordpress.com/2019/11/29/fibbing-friday-november-29th-2019/

1. What happened at Plymouth Rock?   Pilgrim orgy
2. What was the Mayflower Compact?   An old brand of small vehicle, incidentally made by Plymouth
3. What happened to the English settlement of Roanoke, Virginia?   Abducted by aliens, though technically the English settlers were aliens too
4. What really happened at the first Thanksgiving?   For a brief moment the settlers actually entertained the notion of living with the indigenous people as equals, but they were then reminded that the investors back in England were expecting a rate of return and the idea was quickly forgotten
5. Stores used to wait until after Thanksgiving to put out Christmas decorations and merchandise. Why the change?   The advertising industry lives to aggravate the public
6. Why is Thanksgiving always the fourth Thursday in November instead of always the last Thursday in November?   Paperwork error
7. Why do we eat turkey at Thanksgiving and ham at Christmas?   Pigs are required to help eat up the Thanksgiving leftovers, services that are no longer required by Christmas
8. Why do we put lights on Christmas trees?   So they can be seen from outer space
9. Why does Santa have eight reindeer pull his sleigh?   Santa is a Buddhist follower of the eight fold path
10. What are the names of Santa’s eight reindeer?   Bubba, Ox, Chuy, Pigpen, Bertha, Lumpy, Three Finger, and Margarite